Full Circle

Aarzoo jewelry earrings // BCBGMAXAZRIA tuxedo pants // H&M blazer // Prada shoes // Ray-Ban aviators 

Last night Alex and I gave a talk on blogging and digital marketing at UofT’s School of Continuing Studies. It’s quite amazing to see these topics taken seriously in the academic world. When I was a student, blogs were things we kept outside the classroom; it was a novelty to talk about Facebook and Twitter in grad seminars, citing those social media as examples of social and cultural phenomena. Nowadays, there’s an entire class dedicated to the potential consequences of a Facebook “dislike” button. And I’m like, hallelujah.

It was especially important for me to be invited to speak to current students because I did both my undergrad and graduate degrees at the University of Toronto. I spent six years of my formative years there. I not only became a young adult at UofT, but it’s also where I started my blog. While completing my Masters in Film Studies, I had the trifling idea to start a blog about my upcoming trip to Europe. The rest, as they say, is history. But walking around campus last night I couldn’t help but feel the weight of my decision.

I remembered the girl I was in first year Life-Sci, pulling all-nighters at Gerstein Library. Running from class to class, texting to meet up with friends, thinking about the world as a big and scary place. I remembered so many nights spent at Hart House going to dance rehearsals five nights a week after class when I was part of Silhouettes Dance Company.

In grad school, I couldn’t even speak in my seminars during the first semester; I was so afraid of what to say or of being wrong. Me, Justine Iaboni, had trouble speaking in public (and even in private). So, I forced myself to enter a paper in a colloquium, where I had to get up in front of grad students and professors from all over the country and talk about my paper, answer questions and critiques. (Nowadays I feel comfortable talking to ANYBODY). I was so different back then. I had no idea who or what I would become when I left UofT but during that time, it was my home. It was my whole world. Last night I sort of tapped into those old feelings of what that was actually like and it gave me chills, for sure.

Time to get sentimental up in here.

I just can’t believe that my life has gone the way it has because this was never in the cards for me, this was never the plan. Heck, it didn’t even exist. Six years ago my professors would have laughed at me if I said, after I graduate I’m going to become a blogger. Fast forward six years later and I’m being invited back to my alma mater to share all the things I’ve learned from blogging – it’s full circle. It’s a testament to the power of dreaming and thinking that anything is possible. When I was a student I thought I had little worth; to be welcomed back to UofT as someone who can impart knowledge on current students, as someone who is valuable to the industry they have helped forge here in Toronto, is a feeling I cannot describe in words.

Sure, I’m usually flying by at high speeds but last night I took a moment to stop and really try to grasp the meaning of it all. Sure, it may seem trivial to most of you reading this but to me it was very special – I have so far to go in terms of my goals and sometimes it feels like I’m nowhere near where I want to be. But last night, for the first time in a long time, I looked backwards not ahead. And I have to say, for the first time in a long time, I felt proud.

Justine Iaboni