J. Crew seahorse shorts (last season so not avail sorry) // Le Chateau angora sweater (cuz I live in Siberia) // Ray-Ban Wayfarers // Louis Vuitton Neverfull
I, Justine Iaboni, have Hampton FOMO. This is a brave statement to make considering my knowledge of The Hamptons consists of an accumulation of Barefoot Contessa cookbook forwards, Something Navy’s snapchats, The Great Gatsby and this girl I went to high school with who was always vacationing there, who I creeped da fuk out of in her black golf shirts, beer cans and blonde hair until she deleted me off Facebook.
Let me toot my horn a bit here – I did have the chance to go to The Hamptons last weekend, by seaplane, for THE OUTNET’s #THEOUTNETpostcard event. Only problem was the planes were departing from the Pier 47 – not Cabana Pool Bar – so I had to decline.
Having never been to The Hamptons and only ever idealizing it, I’ve come up with my own perversion of it that includes sweaters with shorts and blue and white stripes. Oh, I forgot one other reference, the episode of Sex and the City where Samantha throws that huge party at Richard’s beach house – oh, and when Carrie gets flashed by her married friend’s husband in Season One. Anyway, I still really want to go because whitewashed fences and sand dunes. Amiright?
Instead, I went to The Junction. Put on my seahorse shorts. Took some photos at the “Side of the Road Rose Garden” (it’s actually called that) and slapped a filter on that shit. Voilà, Montauk!
So, it’s probably a completely inaccurate depiction of what The Hamptons looks like, but it’s certainly a completely accurate depiction of what The Hamptons feels like. Look at it really quick for two seconds and tell me the energy you’re picking up. Hamptons, right?
I thought so. #TheSecret.
